1. Know what success is. If you don’t know what
success is (for you), how can you possibly create it? Success is
different things for different people and one person’s success (a
pregnancy for example) might be another person’s catastrophe. That’s
because success (or failure) is not so much about the situation,
circumstance, event or outcome as it is about what that “thing” means to
the person in the middle of it. In order to create success, you must
first define it – and far too many people haven’t. Be very clear about
what you want and don’t want for your life. Clarity produces excitement.
Excitement produces momentum. Momentum produces behavioural change.
Behavioural change produces different results and eventually, the
internal vision becomes an external reality. Giddy-up.
2. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. Some people
will live a life of second-best, of compromise and of under-achievement
simply because they are (1) controlled by fear (2) always looking for
the magic pill or shortcut and (3) not prepared to do the tough stuff.
People who always take the easy option are destined for mediocrity. At
best. Constantly avoiding the discomfort means constantly avoiding the
lessons and the personal growth. Pain is a great teacher. Not always
what we want, but sometimes what we need.
3. Seek to be righteous, not right. The need to be
“right” speaks of arrogance, insecurity, ego and stupidity. It’s also
synonymous with failure. The person who constantly needs to be right
will miss out on much of what life has to teach him and alienate himself
from others. Arrogance repels, humility attracts.
4. Seek respect, not popularity. It’s been said that
our nature is “who we are” and our reputation is who people think we
are. When the two are synonymous, we’re usually on the right path.
5. Embrace mess. To embrace mess is to embrace life
because life is messy, unpredictable, unfair, uncertain, lumpy and
bumpy. So get used to a little chaos. Embrace it even. While others
succumb to the messiness and unpredictability of the human experience,
make a conscious choice to be the calm in the chaos.
6. Don’t become your parents. Or your boss. Or
anyone but you. The enormity of conformity is a problem for the wanna-be
success story. Sure, your parents are great and by all means respect
them, love them and learn from them, but please don’t become them;
that’s just plain ugly and a little bit tragic. Listen to, and learn
from other people, but think, act and decide for yourself. And no, you
don’t need anyone’s approval or permission; you’re big now. It’s okay.
7. Use more of what you already have. Imagine what
you could achieve if you took all the knowledge, intelligence,
opportunities, time, skill and talent that you currently have and
absolutely milked it. What if you already have more than enough talent
to become wildly successful? Well, you do. There go the excuses. And
that voice that’s telling (some of) you right now that you don’t have
what it takes to become successful, that’s called fear. Not logic, fear.
Not reality, fear. Unless of course, you allow that to become your
reality. Be mindful that the voice in your head (the very loud, annoying
and persistent one) is rarely a reflection of your potential and mostly
a manifestation of your insecurity. And no, you’re not alone in your
self-doubt; it’s a universal condition. Many people fail, not because
they don’t have what it takes, but because they don’t use what they
already have. Successful people typically don’t have more innate
potential, luck, time or opportunity than the next person, but they
consistently find a way to use much more of what they have at their
disposal. While the majority are rationalising their lack of decision
making and action taking, these guys are finding a way to get the job
done. The question is not “how much ability do you have, but how much
will you use?”.
8. Be an innovator, not an imitator. Not too many
sheep succeed. Baaah. Sometimes it’s a good idea to build your own team
rather than join someone else’s. Don’t let your fear stand in the way of
your potential to create, innovate or lead. When I set up Australia’s
first commercial personal training centre, most people told me it wouldn’t work. Glad I didn’t listen.
9. Do what most won’t. If you want to achieve what
most people won’t (happiness, joy, calm, wealth, optimal health,
balance) then don’t do what they do. If you want to be like the
majority, then do what they do. Producing different results comes from
doing different things. Simple really. And effective. Most people won’t
persevere, won’t finish what they start, won’t find the good, won’t do
what it takes, won’t question their long-held beliefs, won’t be
solution-focused, won’t do what scares them and won’t “be the change”
they want to see in their world. Choose to be different.
10. Be like water. Powerful. Gentle. Adaptable. Ever-changing.
Being static in a dynamic world – like the one you and I inhabit – is a
recipe for disaster. If you can’t adapt, you can’t succeed. Our
practical, three dimensional reality, and everything in it, is in a
constant state of transition, while some of us are in a constant state
of “same”. Statues don’t succeed, they just get crapped on.
